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Home»Movie Features»Jeremy Renner’s Worst Action Movie is Doing Great On Streaming

Jeremy Renner’s Worst Action Movie is Doing Great On Streaming

Hansel & Gretel: Pitch Hunters

Joshua McCoyBy Joshua McCoyDecember 13, 20243 Mins Read
A shot of Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton from Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters
Image Source: Paramount Pictures

Jeremy Renner always seems a bit out of place as a movie star. Remember The Bourne Legacy? The fourth entry in the celebrated spy franchise knew Matt Damon wouldn’t return, and someone thought Renner was a suitable replacement. Remember Renner’s smartphone app? It was Instagram, but the only available feed was Renner’s. He’s in several of the most critically and financially successful films ever made, but he’s also in Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunter. He’s a true Renner-sance man.

Writer/director Tommy Wirkola seems more comfortable with comedies than anything else. His fondness for folklore shines through in most of his projects. Wirkola broke through in 2009 with the horror comedy cult classic Dead Snow. He helmed Violent Night, which worked out reasonably well. Luckily, he’s gotten back to comedy because his most recent outing is an animated musical about semen called Spermageddon.

Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton Hunt Witches on Amazon Prime’s Top Ten

A shot of Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton from Hansel & Gretel Witch Hunters
Image Source: Paramount Pictures

Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters has a decent premise that could’ve fueled a fun action/horror/comedy. We’ve all seen 100 of these projects that take something familiar and pump it full of blood and swear words. The film follows Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton as the titular Hansel and Gretel. After their harrowing fairy tale experience, they parlay their first victory against a witch into a full-time career. To that end, Hansel and Gretel don leather armor and carry a mix of crossbows and guns. We get it; it’s funny to see the gullible children from the fairy tale become action heroes. The movie is so delighted with this premise that it basically never stops snickering to itself. You will not laugh quite as often as Wirkola must have as he wrote the script. Instead, you’ll sit through endless, samey bloodbaths and dodgy 3D effects.

Jeremy Renner Joins ‘Knives Out 3’ in His First Film Role Since Snowplow Accident
Related: Jeremy Renner Joins ‘Knives Out 3’ in His First Film Role Since Snowplow Accident

The thing I enjoy most about Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters has nothing to do with the film. Those who loved the project see it as a sort of cult-hit B-movie affair. I can appreciate aspects of it on those merits, but its tongue-in-cheek tone is less appealing to me because it seems so pleased with its premise. If you want to see a B-movie, perhaps even a C- or D-movie, check out some of the contemporary knockoffs. As soon as Paramount announced Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunter, less scrupulous studios rushed to rip off the idea. SyFy got there first with Witchslayer Gretel, apparently cutting Hansel out of the deal. The Asylum dropped Hansel & Gretel just 17 days before the real movie hit theaters. They even produced a sequel two years later. Even Lionsgate released Hansel & Gretel: Warriors of Witchcraft. Winter 2013 quickly became the season of the witch hunters.

Jeremy Renner hasn’t slipped into anything quite this silly in a while. I feel like the right place for Hansel & Gretel with guns would have been around 2002. Instead, it fit into a larger trend of weird blockbusters like Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Warm Bodies. Silly premises and shifting genres were the style at the time. If you are looking for a movie about this particular Grimm’s fairy tale, Oz Perkins’ Gretel & Hansel is worth watching. It’s not exactly a tonal match, but it’s oddly much less gory than the action film.

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Joshua McCoy
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Josh is a lifelong film buff, tournament-winning Smash Bros. player, Dungeons & Dragons expert, and dedicated writer in the movies, TV, and gaming spaces.

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